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Curiousity killed the cat

Questions, questions questions, its all that I ever seem to have. I am meant to be looking for a job, instead I spend hours and hours on the internet, searching, searching, searching for anything else. What else can I do? This site has become like my home. Doing anything else doesnt begin to come across my mind. This has become on obsession.

Even though from what I have read, watched, heard, tells me do not seek out slender in person, I want to. I want to go hunt for this Being, even though he terrifies me, chills me to the bones. I want to see him, to feel that terror. 

I know that that is wrong. That i shouldnt go after him if i value my life and my sanity. But the feeling is still there, egging away at the back of my brain. I should stop, but even the meer thought of dropping this reasearch seems crazy. So much, so much, so much............

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